Know the way home

The other day I had to have my eyes dilated and I warned my friends to avoid MoPac and Duval around 3pm that afternoon.  I got a few, "What?! You're driving?"
My response was, "Why? The car knows the way home."

It's been a really rough week.  My mom was diagnosed with cancer and we've been playing those games.  There was the meet and greet with the doctors who told us to wait.  Then there was the waiting.  There was a little crying and a lot of anxiety and thank goodness for the emotional duct tape Klonapin.  It's good for what ails you when you're in the midst of a nightmare such as this.

Finally yesterday we found out that while it is bad, it is not as bad as we thought.  It appears to be treatable. So yesterday evening I got home about 8pm and fell asleep.  I woke up at 2am, peeled my cat off my head, kicked my shoes off and went back to sleep.  I woke up at 6am still exhausted but a little more relieved than I had been the previous day.

This evening I was driving to my boyfriend's for an evening of stir fry and authentic human affection instead of all that my cell phone can provide.  I had my iPod plugged in and it played all the songs I needed to hear:

I Wish I Was the Moon Tonight

Summer Begs

The Long Ride Home

Let Down

Total Eclipse of the Heart

I could tell you why I needed to hear these songs with a little essay about each one, but basically it was a shitty week where I faced the mortality of my remaining parent who I adore.  I was filled equally with dread for the trials we face and relief that though none of them will be easy, her chances of survival are greater than 50/50.  I was headed to a few moments of peace where I got to take a few minutes away from the constant emotional intensity and replace it with some levity and hope and happiness.  Though we're both equally concerned for my mother, we both know there's nothing we can do tonight.

Because I reminded him of Total Eclipse of the Heart I am being made to listen to Love and Rockets to maintain my Indie cred.

And with the luck of an over cast day I did make it home safely from my eye doctor's appointment.  I'm fortunate it was a nice April day in Texas (yes, in February.)