Less Catastrophic

So everything is set. We're going to have a ceremony and a nice little get together with the family and a few of our closest friends. It will be really lovely.

After we'll probably go home and pass out because it's such a big day and we have a lot of preparation but that's fine. We've told everyone that Saturday is our day and they get to leave us alone no matter how far they've come to visit us.

That night though I will go to karaoke and they can come with us if they want. I find that a lot of people are resistant to karaoke so that should shoo them off.  But yes, there will be karaoke. I will sing Video Games by Lana Del Rey and maybe Read My Mind by The Killers. If his brothers show up they can watch me rock it or choke perhaps but either way I'll have fun.

I miss my friend who flaked. I am grieving her loss. She was wacky and funny and I thought she was supportive. But in reality she was unreliable and untrustworthy and now I feel like we never were friends from the beginning. I need closure but not today. I've decided to wait until after the wedding.

This weekend Charles was so sweet and kind and funny and it reminded me that he is the priority in all of this. He is my reason that I am gathering us all together to celebrate. I am his reason. This really is happening. I'm going to marry the man who showed me love can be healthy and helped me to heal from the all the rest.

I can't say no one else before him mattered because I had some relationships that really were important. I really loved some of them but the relationships became so damaged the love could no longer support them. They shaped me into who I am so I can be the woman that Charles loves today.  If it were not for them I may not have been able to appreciate Charles for the kind, funny and loving person he is.

We were at the store on Saturday and we saw this old couple holding hands and being sweet.  He told me he wants us to grow old together and become that couple. I kissed him and turned around and this woman was standing there smiling at us. I blushed and apologized and she said, "No, ya'll are cute. Carry on." Today all I can think is, yeah, we're cute and we shall carry on.